Time Warp

At least I am guessing it has been a time warp.....

Gee, I can't believe it has been so long since I posted.  Nothing cute, not too much funny going on here.  I am actually struggling a bit.  Iron Man has been having some major behavior issues.  I know that it really is not personal....but my LORD - Give me strength!

They have a one hour visit every Friday and lately the behaviors have been challenging....more than when they spent an entire day with bio-mom.  I am thinking on "why"....

Here's my thoughts ~then please, feel free to comment....

We are:

~ overwhelmed with grown-up problems being dumped on them by bio-mom.  (I know this is true to a degree because they told me when she lost her job again!)

~ scared about not going home. Ever.

~ testing the boundaries to see if they are stable. (This seems to be true to a point too because I can 'hear' most of the chaos that ensues during visits. NO CONTROL!)

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I know I has SO many more things rattling around in my brain.....ugh.  Yes, I am overwhelmed, frustrated, angry, hurt, disappointed, scared, ALL for them and its not my mom that can't/won't parent!!  Geesh! My heart really breaks for them.  Over a year into this....and they are no closer to being 'home'.... No closer to living with bio-mom....   No closer to permanency with a forever-family....  NOTHING.  This system is so unfair to these kids.

I felt like we made such progress and now we are going backward fast....

Ok, don't get me wrong: We have made great progress!  They both have grown 1-2" in height, and have gained 10lbs!!!  Yes that is amazing!  And you know what they are working so hard in school!  I am proud of them.