The Roller-Coaster Ride Called Foster Care

Photo: HeraldSun.com.au

Wow, I really can't believe it have been just over a month since I last posted.  I have a few issues...the first being that as a single mom with three foster kids: I am tired.  WOW!  Seriously.  They go to bed at 7-7:15....and I am in bed by 7:16!  HAHA  Ok, maybe not...but close.  Most days are great...but there are many when I am just emotionally drained.

Today is one of those days!  Really.  We had Pooh here a couple weekends ago for an over-nighter...and IT. Was. Awesome.  Seriously. These kids are better behaved when the baby (toddler) is here.  I am shocked every time.  And that Sunday morning...all three boys "snuck" down around 7:30am!  I usually have to 'make' the two oldest stay in bed until 7 on the weekends!! OH, GLORY!!!!!

This past weekend, we actually had Pooh Friday- Sunday.  And it was beyond fabulous.  The kids love each other and life couldn't have been better...well except if he had already moved in with us!!

Today, the high came crashing down.  Apparently, the agency is requesting the state split these siblings....because "they have already been separated for an extended amount of time." WHAT?? Really?  So because they have lived apart for the last 23 months, someone has decided these kids can handle the lifetime of loss and trauma.  OH MY!

Research clearly shows that these children do much better when they are placed together as a sibling group.  It is hard to find families that are willing to adopt 3, or 4 or 5....or more...children together.  I have stated for the past year (After the Guardian Ad Litem asked me if I would consider adopting all four IF it came to that point....) that I would adopt all four children....and I have been asking for this boy to move in with us....with his brothers for the past 18 months.

Today is one of those hard days.  My heart aches for them.  They have already known and experienced more than any child should.  Parental rights are in the process of being terminated....and yet...someone, in some office, that does NOT KNOW MY KIDS....is willing to make such a drastic decision that will affect them forever!!

This, we must stand against.  It is appalling to me that with all the advances made in the area of child welfare we still allow this to continue. (For those of you that may now know: The first child abuse case in the US was brought to the courts by the ASPCA!  REALLY.)  We haven't made it very far in some ways.  You don't believe me?  Check here for a brief History of Child Welfare in the US.

Then please, pray & advocate for these children.  We must take a stand!  God commands us to care for the orphan.... James 1:27 can not be any plainer....."Pure and genuine religion in the sight of God the Father means caring for orphans and widows in their distress and refusing to let the world corrupt you."  RIGHT THERE.....we MUST care for the orphans in their distress.  What is more distressing than the loss of your parents.....and then being torn from your siblings.

Here are some resources:
10 Myths of Sibling Adoption
Sibling Issues in Foster Care
Keeping Siblings Together Past Present and Future
Sibling Bonds & Separation
Alarm Sounded over Separating Siblings in Foster Care
Separating Siblings - The Liz Library
Sibling Ties